July 12, 2020
- Thought when I woke up: Family day!
- Thought when I fell asleep: Going to miss this while I’m gone.
The days before a long hike or any trip are always a bit surreal. Everyone is a little more on edge with their surroundings, the sounds are more serene. In a word, the family is more aware of each other in so far as one of their members is about to leave, and as a result we all tend to nudge a little closer.
Its also a family tendency to want to talk about big things. I mean like really big things…Dreams, goals, material purchases. This trip was no different. Cars, daycare, our children’s education, retiring to far away lands, all were topics of discussion that made it to the dinner table on this particular day.
Anyone who has counted a cat or dog among their family members has experienced what the days before a journey are like. When the suitcase comes out suddenly everything becomes hyper real and all bets of normal are off. How you handle it is determined by who you, as a person, are. There is anticipation. There is joy. But, there is also anxiety and the faint whispers in the air of upcoming loss. A good thing about all this is that the thoughts in our heads rearrange themselves differently. Priorities become much clearer and that far away thing that has been preoccupying our minds is found to not be all that significant in importance next to the immediate needs of the family.
Two days before a long hike is always one of my favorite days. If I had to pinpoint a reason why, its that life cavitates differently. Today was no exception
They know you are about to leave
No, it’s not as bad as all that. The innocence of a young one thinks little of adult fears, but they do know that something is different. It is not lost on me that my baby girl is a bit more patient and well-behaved. More content to be in dad’s arms as if to whisper “If you can’t take me with you, please hold me alittle while longer” Tomorrow will be busy, then dad will be gone. The last calm before the storm happens 2 days before you go as you begin to shift directions.
The day immediately before a hike is always packed with to many last minute details to be relaxing and enjoyable. Its full of hurriedly to be accomplished work of the never-ending sort. Basically, things you’ve been procrastinating and putting off that you don’t want to deal with on return.
From the opening in my door, I hear the pitter patter of little feet being led to the living room by her mom. Possibly, I hear them so clearly against the silent backdrop of planning last minute hiking details that I will remember that sound wafting down the hall forever. Soon, to shatter the anxiety, a good game of tickles breaks out. Smiles abound and once again the house is filled with the best medicine, laughter. A good memory is captured.
The end of day has been relaxing, all things considered. It was spent with both immediate family and the extensions. Good dinner, good conversation and a relaxing game of cards were enjoyed by all. Completely satisfied with the days’ outcome and being content in my choices as a father even with all the associated provider worries, I close my eyes. Tomorrow will go fast.
